Seattle Police Supply Hempfest with Munchies

August 20th, 2013

Last week we reported that Minneapolis PD was supplying the Occupy Movement with free pot. This week Seattle PD is supplying a pot festival with free snacks. People often wonder why we predicted marijuana legalization in the dystopian future of the Silver Circle Movie, but it makes perfect sense if you think about it. As the domestic police force is transformed into a domestic army, it’s useful to provide a way to chill out the herd. That’s when I see in these kinds of publicity stunts.

Police called it “Operation Orange Fingers.” Cute no?

Marijuana is now legal in Washington, so droves of liberated giggle boxes migrated to Seattle for Hempfest. Hempfest says its goal is “to educate the public on the myriad of potential benefits offered by the cannabis plant, including the medicinal, industrial, agricultural, economic, environmental, and other benefits and applications.” The annual event was once described as the “the world’s largest annual gathering advocating decriminalization of marijuana.” As you can imagine, this year there was much more celebration, and less advocacy, to be done. It’s a 3-day long political rally, concert, and arts and crafts fair, with attendance typically over 250,000.

250,000 stoners can eat a lot of chemical infused corn chips. Police brought 1,000 bags and ran out in less than 30 minutes.

This was not merely meant as a public service. The Seattle PD wanted to  inform the jubilant attendees of the new rules surrounding recreational marijuana use in the state. Seattle police Sgt. Sean Whitcomb said.

“We knew if we did leaflets, it would turn into litter,” he said. “We wanted people to be able to access the information. It’s actually fun to read. We wanted to do it in a way that is deliberately ironic.”

Each bag was slapped with a sticker containing the Dos and Don’ts of marijuana use under the new law.

Isn’t that hillarious? If the CNN Report is any indication, the attendees “ate it up.” Will the jokes never cease?

I hate to harsh your mellow, but the most preposterous bit of this whole stunt is the very end, “♥, SPD.”

I’m sorry, but do the thugs that were kicking in your door, shooting your dog, and generally killing your buzz last week, really think some $260 of free snacks and a Pink Floyd joke makes up for it this week? Sadly it probably will. Someone told me marijuana affects the memory… I just don’t remember who.

Maybe I’m just too cynical for my own good, but isn’t this basically a nicely wrapped threat? “Don’t use pot in public. You could be cited but we’d rather give you warning.” And do they even know what shotgunning is?

All I’m saying is, keep your eye on the bowl, stoners. Marijuana was not decriminalized yet, they just loosened the laws a bit. The War On Drugs rages on, and the cops are still not your friends. They’re still rent-seeking bureaucrats with guns, and with they’re resources freed up from busting pot heads, you can bet they’ll find some other reason to harass you. My guess: political dissent.

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About the Author: Davi Barker

In grade school Davi refused to recite the pledge of allegiance because he didn't understand what it meant. He was ordered to do as he was told. In college he spent hours scouring through the congressional record trying to understand this strange machine. That's where he discovered Dr. Ron Paul. In 2007 he joined the End The Fed movement and found a political home with the libertarians. The Declaration of Independence claims that the government derives its power “from the consent of the governed." He does not consent.