Russell Brand vs. Arnold Schwarzenegger 2016

Two big names in entertainment are making political waves this week. Comedian Russell Brand is trying his hand editing a political magazine and gave a fantastic interview on BBC’s Newsnight. Governator Arnold Schwarzenegger is reportedly trying to change the law so he can run for President, even though he’s an immigrant. At least it would shut up all the Birthers. So I thought… what if Schwarzenegger succeeded in changing the law, and we saw him go head-to-head against Brand for President in 2016?

You’ve gotta see this video.

Here’s why I think this is actually possible. First off, Republicans got nothing. They already tried the senile old war veteran. Then they tried the plastic corporate spokeshole. The only constituency they have left is the fair weather patriots stupid enough to vote for the wrong Paul. The political pendulum is swinging their direction and they’ve got no A game. Seems to me they need a Reagan. An aging Hollywood action hero from California with just enough acting ability to puppet some good sound bites from some vaguely libertarian intellectuals who can convince a groundswell of right-wing conservatives that they actually believe in freedom.

Congressional Republicans know this, and Congressional Democrats would probably rather go up against a moderate Republican like Schwarzenegger than a polarizing figure like Rand anyway. If there’s one thing we can count on Congress to do it’s trash the Constitution for a little short term gain. So, why not let Schwarzenegger run?

After that, who do the Democrats got? Hillary Clinton? Huma Abedin? They got nobody. So, given the new criterion, they’ll import. Now, if the Democrats don’t go for Brand, because he’s too radical, the Green Party might.  (Let the Libertarian Party sit this one out. They aren’t accomplishing anything anyway). The Democratic Party would immediately be revealed as the cauldron of hypocrites and thieves that they are. Brand would obliterate Schwarzenegger with his verbal jousting, and we could have our first third party, non-American U.S. President ever. After that the political field would be wide open.

I say go for it. Politics is so stagnant now it could use a little fresh blood. And besides, if the dollar hegemony means that the entire world is subject to the hidden tax of dollar inflation isn’t it taxation without representation if we don’t allow them to participate in the democratic process?

The best part is, Brand wouldn’t even vote for himself. In his BBC interview he called for revolution and admitted he had never voted in his life, and wasn’t about to start. Host Jeremy Paxman tried to assert he had no authority to express a political opinion if he couldn’t be troubled to vote, but he shot back, “I don’t get my authority from this preexisting paradigm which is quite narrow and only serves a few people.” He continued, “I don’t need the right from you. I don’t need the right from anybody. I’m taking it.” He explained:

“It’s not that I’m not voting out of apathy. I’m not voting out of absolute indifference and weariness and exhaustion from the lies, treachery, deceit of the political class that’s been going on for generations now and which has now reached fever pitch where we have a disenfranchised, disillusioned, despondent underclass that are not being represented by that political system, so voting for it is tacit complicity with that system.”

Bravo Brand!

As for the Austrian (the country not the economic school) Schwarzenegger, there’s a lot of paperwork to file before this is feasible, but he’s working on it. And it’s a pretty strong argument. How can they possibly claim he enjoys equal protection and representation under the law if he’s not allowed equal right to seek public office? I just want to see the glorious political spectacle that would be a debate between these two.

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